How to pick up women.

Okay. Picking up women is quite simple. "Women want a man with steel balls." - http://www.menshealth.com/mhlists/pick_up_women_with_confidence/index.php

This is true. Confidence is key when picking up women. All you need to pick up women is confidence. Don't worry about the outcome of what she'll say. Just be calm and collected and have fun. Don't instantly compliment her on her looks either, even if she has the most beautiful eyes you've ever seen in your life. You can tell her that later. Much later. Compliments on clothes may work sometimes, but don't bank on that. Make her smile, and laugh, and you're a shoe in. Women just want to have fun. Be friendly, but also make your point clear. You want her. Don't be so friendly that you're instantly in the friend zone. No man wants to be there. Also, never use pick up lines. The best way to start a conversation is with a smile, and making them laugh. As long as you have confidence, you will usually get the girl. Just don't over do it. "This desire is evolutionary. Females want someone who's not going to run from a fight, a man who is confident in his ability to provide and protect." - http://www.menshealth.com/mhlists/pick_up_women_with_confidence/index.php
Simply put, confidence gets the girl. So if you want to be more attractive to women, show your bravado. But I don't mean by pounding your chest or the drunk at the end of the bar. You don't have to be a wiseguy to make yourself instantly irresistible.- http://www.menshealth.com/mhlists/pick_up_women_with_confidence/index.php

Self-confidence is extremely sexy to a woman. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that, more than a man's good looks and more than his gentlemanly manner, confidence is the trigger trait that makes a woman want you.- http://www.menshealth.com/mhlists/pick_up_women_with_confidence/index.php


And that's how you get the girl.

A brief history of women.

"The Old English wifman meant "female human""-http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Woman

So listen. I am here to educate you on the history of women. Having this knowledge in your cranial inventory will further help you and your poor excuse for “game”, reel in that shark of a woman. A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, there was a man named Adam, and from his rib was created Eve. This is how the “woman” came to be. From then on, there was woman; right by man’s side. Staying home to prepare him lunches, and doing the dirty laundry and dishes. Women were always loyal to men, and men loved women. They loved everything that came along with women as well. As man would not be complete without women. Soon though, there was trouble in paradise as a great tragedy occurred in the world of man. In 1972, a vile amendment was passed through congress called the Equal Rights Amendment or Amendment 19, which gave women equal rights to man. Now women could vote, get jobs, and even think on their own. As you can see, it was now becoming more difficult in the world of man to attract a female because they were getting smarter. Now men really had to step up their game, and be smart about how they attracted a mate. Luckily though, in most careers men still earn more money than women, so we can still attract them by playing the “big money card.” Soon women will become entirely equal to men, and only the strongest will survive. Many scrawny bloodlines will die out, because they couldn’t attract a girl. This is why I am helping you. I must help save the male population of the world somehow, and teaching even the nerdiest of men to get women is the way to go. So, always bring you’re A-Game, and get the girl. Confidence is key. Now go man up.  

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Wipe that substance off of your face and listen up...

Listen, I’m finna be talking about the appropriate way to pick up the ladies. First of all, get out of those piece of crap articles of cloth you call clothes, and put on something that’s actually nice, you freaking fluffer. Second, clean up and shave that rat’s nest of a beard before the birds come a flockin’. Lastly, wipe out that gank gunk in your eyes so you can read what I’m writing to you, so you can finally bring a female back home to your poor excuse of a mother.  Now, I’m going to try and explain this to you the easiest way possible so even your feeble brain can comprehend. Kay? Kay.  The whole point of this post is going to be to get your lanky butt a female companion so that you can stop calling your hand, your girlfriend. Also, I don’t want you bringing back some troll of a girl home just because she has the parts. Take your spine out of your mom’s purse, wipe that cheeto cheese off your poor excuse of a torso, and leave the house to get some chicks. After reading this fantastic compilation of notes, soon in no time even your nerdy behind will be bringing home smokin’ models. As long as you obey my guidelines, and clean your sorry butt up, you will be one step closer to losing that “card”. If this doesn’t work for you, then clearly you were far too gone already and might as well go play some Pokémon tournaments you hot dog loving hag. Anyways, the main thing here is that you’re finally going to get some chicks on your lap. Just don’t get so excited that you pop you sick boon.  

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